[Stephenie Meyer] Epub Twilight Read online


Evocably in love with himDeeply seductive and extraordinarily suspenseful Twilight is a love story with bite Ohhh yeah I made a BookTube Video all about my scandalously unpopular twilight opinions check out the video to see itif you dareAnyway onwards to the review So my review might be a bit biasedThis was my first and only major episode of fangirling I owned a tshirt vegetarian vampire so edgy I saw the first movie an embarrassingly high number of times in theater I judged people based off of Team Edward or Team Jacob for the record Edward in the books Jacob in the moviesEven now than 10 years later I still absolutely adore this first book there s too many good feelings I tried so so hard to look at this book with my sophisticated grown up eyes to see past all the trite plotholes and develop a good sound hatred of Twilight I just can t I live for this series So just keep in mind where I am coming from when I decided to reread this one My overwhelming realization Bella should probably be hospitalized There is no way she doesn t have some inner ear or traumatic brain injury There is no physically relevant way a seventeen year old could be that unbalanced It defies all logic It s like every time I turned the page there d she go Falling Again You really should stay away from me The other overwhelming realization Rosalie was the voice of reason I remember absolutely hating her because she was the only one who stood between Edward and Bella How dare she not love that they re in love Well now that I m older it s of YOU RE ONLY SEVENTEEN AND HE S A HUNDRED YEARS OLDER Team Rosalie the voice of reason all the wayDespite everything the cheesy uotes the terribly unrealistic portrayal of love and the big sparkling plot holes I can t help it I was unconditionally and irrevocably in love with himMe falling in love with this book all over again Ps Still got that 10 yr old vegetarian vampire shirt in the back of my closetPchokengtitiktitikchokengs yes That s my original Twilight copy literally worn away from my multiple rereadsAudiobook CommentsWell read by Ilyana Kadushin though I wish the guy voices were a bit distinct when the girl reader said them They were all just slightly deeper version of girl voices Not much variation in toneinflection The 2018 PopSugar Reading Challenge A book made into a movie you ve already seenYouTube Blog Instagram Twitter Snapchat mirandareads

CHARACTERS Ý PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB ↠ Stephenie Meyer


About three things I was absolutely positiveFirst Edward was a vampireSecond there was a part of him and I d Okay I have to say that I picked this book up partly due to all the hype and partly because it s involved two of my favorite genres I mean so many people had recommended it to me and I finally got sick of hearing about it so I picked it up and read it or as least tried toLet me first say that I am a huge romance and vampiresupernatural fan so when I first heard about the book I was really excited to read it because it combined two of my favorite genresBut I really regret ever buying and forcing myself to finish it I hate not finishing books even if I hate them it was so bad Though let me tell you that I really wanted to like it really I did I m one of those people who likes a lot of popular things Twilight was popular so I figured I would love it just like everyone else but I was very very wrong A lot of fans wonder why I hate the book so much and here is my list and it s a pretty long one so get ready1 Lack of characterizationBella Okay I absolutely hated this girl She was the worst female protagonist I have ever read about She s stupid shallow selfish and just plain annoying Not to mention she s pathetically dependent on Edward I mean come on NO girl should be that dependent on a boy not only is that pathetic but it is very unhealthy She was also a clumsy little damsel in distress who was dumb enough to get herself into situations that she couldn t get out of I would have loved for Meyer to have given her a backbone so she could have done something useful instead of whining and doing stupid idiotic things that no remotely intelligent teenage girl would actually do Not to mention the fact that she is apparently very plain looking if that s the case then why are there several guys fawning over her And according to Meyer one of them is a teacher um ew Bella is a Mary Sue simple as that And I hate Mary SuesEdward Okay this boy is just way too possessive and stalkerish it is not romantic of him to sneak into Bella s room and watch her sleep It s creepy and wrong Oh and bad boys usually don t sit there and say I m dangerous stay away etc all the time I also hated the fact that Bella described some part of his body every other page It was completely UNNECESSARY Okay we get the fact that he s hot Bella now MOVE ON I could go on and on about all the characters every single one of them was a flat cardboard cut out that did not seem realistic at all2 Writing stylePurple Prose Ew to this seriously all the purple prose made me want to throw the book across the room Enough said 3 DescriptionsI know I said up there that I got sick of reading about how gorgeous some part of Edward s body was every other paragraph and if that wasn t bad enough what s worse than is the fact that even with all that unnecessary description of him and everyone else though mostly him since Bella is that shallow I still had a hard time picturing him or any of the characters in my head for that matter I also had a hard time picturing a lot of the setting and the action in my head as well It s kind of sad really there was so much description you would think that everything Edward especially would be embedded into my brain but no That s what makes me wonder why so many fans find Edward so hot I never got a clear picture of him in my head to even begin to form an opinion about whether he was hot or notSeriously Meyer completely abused the dictionary and the thesaurus while writing this book so much so that I think she should never be allowed to look at either one ever again there are so many big descriptive words used that could be replaced by smaller words that look and sound better Half the time the words that she does use doesn t really go with what she s trying to say Simply put Stephenie Meyer is a moron and doesn t know that when writing you are supposed to use the thesaurus sparingly aka only when it is truly needed and not any time you damn well please it really ruins everything if it s used too much as Meyer has perfectly portrayed with this atrocious book4 PlotOkay the plot gets it s own category because it pissed me off so much I mean seriously where was it It was nothing but sappy gag worthy fluff between Edward and Bella until page 400 or so when something finally happened And even then it went by so fast and was not explained well at all since Bella conveniently fainted during it which is such a cop out It seemed to me that Meyer just threw it in there and it was only put there in the first place so that she could point at it and say Look there s a plot right there when people like me came around and said otherwise But that s not a plot The plot should not take 400 pages to start And no the whole romance between Bella and Edward is not the plot This is especially the case since we knew from the beginning thanks to the moronic give away on the back cover that states that Bella and Edward were going to fall in love speaking of that who the hell thought it would be a good idea to give away the fact that Edward was a vampire on the back cover I mean really That took away any suspensemystery the book might have had for the reader about what he was so while Bella was stupidly wondering what he was I was sitting there yelling at her for being such a moron and not seeing what was right in front of her5 Plot holes The one thing that drove me absolutely CRAZY was the the fact that no one in the small town of Forks noticed that the Cullens never aged And the children never graduated and went on to college I mean if they ve been there for than four years than I m assuming that someone would have noticed I mean the town could not be full of that many morons Okay I ve been told several times that Cullens have only been living in Forks for about two years I guess all the purple prose distracted me from reading and remembering that little detail Speaking of school why in the world would they willingly choose to take high school over and over again Especially since they all have several college degrees which leads me to wonder why since they are so human loving they can t do something useful with their education like Carlisle instead of sitting on their butts all day and just being useless I know they need to fit in but seriously that s just stupid they could always pretend that they re home schooled it s not that uncommon these days Since that s how the Cullens fit into society that means they have to move every four or five years to avoid suspicion right Wow that must really suck However they wouldn t have to do that if they didn t put the younger ones in school since if they were in the workforce and being useful to society then they could stay for a lot longer before people started wondering why they don t age But I think I know why Edward and his siblings tortured themselves day after day by going to high school Stephenie Meyer wasn t creative enough to come up with any other way for Edward and Bella to meet It would have made sense for them to have been neighbors or something I can come up with several nice ideas about how that would have turned out and it would have been much betterI ve been told that there are but those are the two that really bugged me Though I love the fans response to the mention of any plot hole the rabid ones not the sane ones of course It usually goes like this Well it is a fictional vampire book That s a stupid reason Just because it s a book with vampires doesn t mean it s exempt from having to be realistic and not having glaring plot holesI ve also been told that there are even in later books but I m not about to torture myself by reading the rest of the series just to find them and list them I have better things to do with my time like reading books that are actually good and not a waste of my time or money6 VampiresLike I said before I m a big vampire fan But this book is an embarrassment to vampire fiction The vampires are pathetic sweet innocent almost misunderstood creatures I know that Meyer has every right to create her own idea about vampires And to be honest I was okay with her idea about vampires until they started sparkling VAMPIRES DON T SPARKLE To have them sparkle takes away the evilness of the myth of the creatures since they are creatures of the devilat least originally they were Evil creatures do not sparkle the idea s laughable at best Most normal people are not scared of something that sparkles in the sun I mean I know if I saw someone sparkling I would not immediately think vampire and run Not only because I don t associate sparkling with vampires but also because how the hell is sparkling evil or scary By the way the whole sparkling vampire idea just seemed to be there because Meyer wanted a reason as to why the vampires could even walk around in the daylight to begin with The idea was just a convenient way for her to write the vampires Since she s incapable of coming up with a better much creative idea I don t mind the fact that they could come out during the day since that s not unheard of in vampire fiction nowadays but I wish that Meyer had come up with a better idea that didn t make me laugh uncontrollably at the thought All the other myths about vampires are nonexistent Holy water and garlic won t bother them just like the sun stake through the heart won t kill them either even beheading them won t get rid of them She made her vampires practically invincible which is annoying The only way to really kill one of her vampires is to rip it apart and burn the pieces or to blow it up Two things that a human would have a hard time doing which makes me wonder why if they re so invincible they live in secrecy Especially since from my knowledge most vampires don t live like the Cullens they could careless about humans If most other vampires were so cruel why don t they come out to humanity and take over It makes a lot sense since a mere human would have a very difficult time killing just one vampire The fact that they had no weaknesses annoyed the crap out of me Along with being almost invincible they all had these special powers but they didn t have the bad side effects with them only the good All in all her vampires were perfectI don t like my vampires to be blood thirsty monsters that kill everything in sight But I also don t want them to be so pathetic and innocent either The only two vampiric ualities that are there are the ones that are well known among everyone drinking blood well sort of since the Cullens are vegetarian vampires an idea that seriously made me laugh and being immortal Otherwise the Cullens are disgustingly human likeI think the thing I have the problem with the most is the fact that Meyer has never seen any vampire moviestv shows or read any vampire novels There s this saying in regards to writing Write what you know Stephenie Meyer knew nothing about vampires when she wrote this horrible excuse for a vampire novel which is probably why it was so awful in comparison to other vampire novels whether those books are in the romance section of the bookstore or the horrorsci fi section A good author always does their research whether it s fiction or non fiction is irrelevant This doesn t mean that she needed to go by the other myths it just means that she should have done a little research to see what she was getting herself into If she had done this I would have been able to respect her ideas because at least then she would have done her research Where the vampires are concerned this novel is an embarrassment to vampiresupernatural fiction7 MessagesI am somewhat appalled at the messages that this book sends out they are so anti feminist it s disgusting1 It s perfectly okay to have no goals or aspirations or even an education just get yourself a man and he ll take care of you All Bella wants is to be with Edward some aspirations huh2 It s also perfectly okay to like someone because of their physical features this is not love people it s lust They have nothing in common He likes her because she smells nice and she likes him because he s hot Bella goes on and on and on about how hot some part of Edward is every other page3 When you have several guys fawning over you pick the hottest one of them all because looks are so very important Mike and Eric pretty much say the same thing to Bella on her first day of school but she s nicer to Mike than Eric because the latter wasn t very attractive Also she picks Edward because of his looks as well4 It s okay if the guy you love sneaks into your bedroom and watches you sleep at night before you even know him all that well that s completely normal and romantic not the the least bit creepy or stalkerish It s completely disgusting to hear girls talk about this They swoon and gush about how romantic it is seriously what is wrong with people these days5 It is perfectly okay to become completely obsessed with your boyfriend and depend on him for everything Bella s obsession and dependence on Edward sets feminism back a couple hundred years or so6 It also teaches that not only is it okay to change yourself for a guy but it s also okay to give up EVERYTHING for him as well Bella wants to become a vampire and leave her family and friends to be with Edward What The Hell7 Your life is not complete until you find a man This is nothing but a LIE Girls do not need a man to be completeLike with the plot holes I ve been told that there are many terrible messages in later books and once again I m not about to go out and read the books However I will say this from what I ve heard they sound worse than the ones I ve already listed8 The ObsessionWell this gets its own category mostly because I just don t understand what all the obsession is over it s a book and a poorly written one at that I run across girls all the time arguing over who Edward belongs to it s pathetic and kind of scary He s a book character he doesn t belong to anyone but Meyer since she s the one who created himI also hate the fact that I can t go into the book store now without being bombarded with a huge display dedicated to this crappy series makes me sick to see such praise and popularity for a mediocre book series when there are so much better authors out there that are virtually ignored since they write real fiction and none of this poorly written wish fulfillment fantasy crapThis was obviously a fulfillment story that I would expect a preteen to write on her livejournal This is not a book I would expect a thirty something year old woman with a college education to write and actually attempt and then succeed in getting published And it was a degree in English seriously I would have expected much better from someone who had that degree since she spent college studying books and analyzing them etc you would think that she would know how to write one the proper wayMeyer could have made this book great but no instead she took the easy way out a cliched simple overused plot and added vampires to itas if that made it any differentHonestly I ve read better over on fictionpresscom and that s really sad because most of the authors over there are between the ages of 14 and 26 and are amateurs in the field Maybe if Meyer had posted this up there first it would have been a much better story because the good writers over there would have set her straight Maybe then I would have been able to get through the novel because it might have actually been goodAnd oh just for the record Twilight is NOT the next Harry Potter nor is it better than Harry Potter I say that not only because JK Rowling actually has talent but also because they are in completely different genres and can t really be comparedThough it does make me sick to see Harry Potter even mentioned in the same sentence as this piece of crap unfortunately that couldn t be avoided in this review and it s an insult to JK Rowling to have her amazing writing compared to the horrible writing of Stephenie MeyerEDIT I found this site and thought I should share with everyone creator of the above site has scanned copies of the Twilight books on to her computer and has taken it upon herself to point out the many issues that the books have these are mostly grammatical in nature If you are a fangirl who believes that Twilight is perfect and has no flaws then you should really take a look at this

Stephenie Meyer ↠ 6 FREE DOWNLOAD

Idn't know how dominant that part might be that thirsted for my bloodAnd third I was unconditionally and irr I really enjoy lively details There s nothing better than knowing an author has really thought about her characters and situations and come up with some surprising and delightful detail that makes the whole reading experience fuller Lively details you understand pointless details are a nightmare to read I don t need to know that Bella ate a granola bar for breakfast I REALLY DON T Notice that I remembered the granola bar I think this is partly because I was fervently hoping it would have significance Like she would spectacularly choke on her oatmeal the next day and think AH I should have had a granola bar like yesterdayShow don t tell is not the be all and end all of writing There s a little thing called summary narrative It s beautiful it facilitates plot progression without having to follow your narrator through 24 fucking hours of a day and watch as she eats a fucking granola bar for breakfastI ve seen this novel accused of Mary Sue ism and um yeah any character named Isabella Swan seems destined to be a Mary Sue But honestly I wouldn t begrudge a semi autobiographical story if it actually had any of the realism of autobiography All the high schoolteenage stuff honestly made me boggle Because that s not what high school is like That s not what being seventeen is like Twilight reads like well it reads like a thirtysomething who has no recollection of being 17 Bella has all the emotional maturity of a 32 year old and that s just not remotely believable Meyer is not a bad writer She has the ability to string words together Unfortunately she lacks any kind of flair There was no original description no truly evocative language Twilight reads like Meyer has read a lot of mediocre novels and regurgitated the same kind of language onto the page There is just nothing exciting to the language The dialogue is awful not only uninspiring and lacking in wit but it s all the same There s no difference in speech patterns to the characters no awareness of personal tics The characterization is wafer thin see above re Mary Sue The plotting is terrible the novel trundles along at a slow pace for 250 pages and then Meyer seems to suddenly realize she needs a climax and the gears shift abruptly and the reader is caught up in a series of ridiculous contrivances that set up Meyer s final set piece which by the way I saw coming a mile awayThis is such a profoundly antifeminist novel And it s funny because I think Meyer has no idea that it s antifeminist I mean she has a female heroine A heroine who reads Austen and writes essays about misogyny in Shakespeare Surely she s kicking butt for all womankind Um no She cooks she cleans she looks after the man in her life She needs male characters to protect her from the big bad scary world She falls headfirst into a disturbingly dysfunctional relationship with a man 90 years her senior without the slightest amount of worrySeriously BellaEdward What s that all about I don t get the attraction He has her in his thrall She is let me uote unconditionally and irrevocably in love with him and after like a week oO She s consumed by him she s willing to sacrifice her life for him and that s romantic I just think it s a bit sick really You know what I find romantic Human warmth Not sweeping dramatic statements of everlasting and overarching love Little sweet moments of connection that ring true That s something Twilight s apparently epic love story is sorely lacking in Did I say Bella has the emotional maturity of a 32 year old Well except when it comes to Edward There she has the emotional maturity of a dumb dog

10 thoughts on “Twilight

  1. says:

    Okay I have to say that I picked this book up partly due to all the hype and partly because it's involved two of my favorite genres I mean so many people had recommended it to me and I finally got sick of hearing about it so I picked it up and read it or as least tried toLet me first say that I am a huge romance and vampiresupernatural fan so when I first heard about the book I was really excited to read it because it combined two

  2. says:

    Actual rating 15 stars Believe it or not there are actually a few books that are worse than TwilightOk funny story I was sitting on my couch

  3. says:

    Oh my This book to me is like chocolate a delicious sinful addictive indulgence which you convince yourself has beneficial ualities zinc calcium keeps me uiet at that time of the month in order to justify your addictionBy beneficial ualities I mean that it's reading and since when is reading bad Let me say uite c

  4. says:

    I hate this book I will probably end up reading the rest of them because if I don't people that love this thing will think they can convert me if I just keep reading ETA Jan 2013 Never even remotely bothered to f

  5. says:

    It turns out we don't need Dr John Gray to tell us that men are from Transylvania and women are from Venus We just need to read Stephenie Meyer books For example from this book we learn that the millions of women who have wolfed down the Twilight series pun intended want men who1 Talk about their feelings Either Meyer's husband is the single most communicative male on the planet and she doesn't realize how unusual he is or she li

  6. says:

    I really enjoy lively details There's nothing better than knowing an author has really thought about her characters and situations and come up with some surprising and delightful detail that makes the whole reading experience fuller Lively details you understand pointless details are a nightmare to read I don't need to know that Bella ate a granola bar for breakfast I REALLY DON'T Notice that I remembered the g

  7. says:

    my name is bella bella swan here's what stephenie didn't tell you it's super duper importanton the morning after it rained it was rainy outside and i frowned at it being so rainy all the time i chuckled to myself darn weather i stared at the rain outside which is where they usually keep the rain there was never any rain in phoenix i love phoenix i hate rain i tripped over a large air pocket on my bedroom flo

  8. says:

    Ohhh yeah I made a BookTube Video all about my scandalously unpopular twilight opinions check out the video to see itif you dareAnyway onwards to the review So my review might be a bit biasedThis was my first and only major episode of fangir

  9. says:

    I actually had to give this book three separate reviews by three sides of my personality My three star rating is the median of the three Review 1 by My Inner Fifteen Year Old Girl 5 starsBella is smart funny well read pretty and yet misunderstood by most of her peers just like me Then she meets a cool hot guy who turns out to be a good vampire and he can do really cool things like run fast and stop cars with his hands but he's still sweet

  10. says:

    Save your time here's the entirety of Twilight in 20 dialogue snippets a wiggedy wack intermissionFirst 200 pagesI like you EdwardYou shouldn't I'm dangerousI like you EdwardBut I'm dangerousNext 50 pagesI'm a vampireI like you EdwardBut I'm a vampire I'm dangerousI like you EdwardNext 100 pagesI like you EdwardYou smell g